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Your Business and Your
Family
I have noted that the Internet
contains a lot of sites dedicated to self-motivation and self-improvement.
That's not surprising; there are a lot of negative factors and influences
that we need to overcome just to maintain an even keel. And for the
Internet businessperson, those negatives can be multiplied a hundred times
over (did I hear someone say a thousand times?)
Multiplied Stresses
Most Internet businesses are started by people who are also working a
full-time job, so the pressures and stresses are multiplied, and marriages
and families suffer the consequences. Elusive goals such as wealth,
independence and more family time drive us on, but in the meantime we may
be facing increased financial difficulties, slavery to the business and
almost no family time. Strange, isn't it, that the more we struggle to
reach these goals, the more they seem to recede in the distance? How can
we face this paradox and get through it without sacrificing the most
important things in our lives - marriage and family?
Set Limits
Entering into an Internet business without getting your spouse to sign
onto the process is a sure recipe for disaster. And you can't expect him
or her to sign a blank contract. Although you can't know exactly what to
expect, you can and must establish some limits of time and expenditures
that are acceptable for both of you. If you have children of school age,
it is good to also include them in the discussions of what you are doing
and why. These limits will undoubtedly need to be re-examined periodically
as circumstances change, but it must be mutual process.
Include your spouse
While it may be difficult, it is highly desirable to somehow include your
spouse in your business. That way, he or she feels an ownership in the
process and will bring a different perspective to the business that is
almost always helpful. And don't discount the great pleasure to be found
in working together toward a mutual goal. After all, you married him or
her because you liked to do things together, didn't you? Some find that
attempting to include your partner creates additional problems, but that
is usually because you are trying to force your partner into a role for
which he or she is simply not suited. Be flexible enough to agree, for
example, that your wife may never understand how to FTP those files. Work
together to find that niche that both fits her and contributes to your
business success.
A Larger Perspective
While there can be great mutual satisfaction in pursuing a common goal
of building a successful Internet business, don't discount the unifying
power of fitting those goals into a larger, eternal perspective.
Businesses are temporal arrangements. If life is to have its greatest
meaning, it must somehow be tied to something that transcends and outlasts
the pursuit of financial success. And, unless you believe that marriage is
a purely human convention, you will find that the pursuit of the divine
purpose for marriage and for your individual existence will bring a
greater unity to your relationship, business included. I invite you to
consider this way of thinking about how to discover that
divine purpose.
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